And All the Angels Cried...

An event happened today that proves if you're better than me bad things will happen to you. Tom Brady, perfect, tore his ACL and is out for the season. I wish it was his face but I won't get greedy. If you want a summary of everything I hate about Tom Brady you can see it in this short video:

I believe this is all a karmic plan to take away all that The Force hath giveth he. I hope that his back-up leads the team to an undefeated season and a Superbowl victory. Then, Tom Brady's self esteem will take a five rope shot in the mouth and he'll become a drunkard and watch as his even perfecter back-up steals his job for goodsies. Who's smiling now, Tom? I bet it's hard to throw a touchdown while inserting your penis into a super model now that you can't stand on your angel-sculpted calves. That's what you get for being all "look at me! I'm Tom Brady!" Dick.