EWA100 - #70. Das EFX - They Want EFX

70. Das EFX - They Want EFX (EastWest. 1992. From the LP Dead Serious)

Mike Dikk:
Das EFX were so ahead of their time. Not so much for their whole “diggety diggety doo doo” rhyme style, but for dropping like 53,000 retro pop culture references in one song. Something like that would sell BILLIONS today. Everyone is so retro obsessed with retro something or other now, and I bet you if Das got back together right now and their first comeback single was “They Want More EFX” and it was all like “I’m on a viggedy Vision Quest with Biggedy Buckaroo Bon-Zai, we spent the wiggedy Weekend At Bernies and shot miggedy Magnum P.I.” peoples heads would fucking EXPLODE.
There are several thousand television shows dedicated to reliving the 80’s so I know I’m right. Das EFX were doing that shit in song form 15 years ago. Some of the references in this song were painfully dated even for purposely retro pop culture references. That whole “They call me Puddin’ Tang” thing, my grandfather used to say that! I guess they couldn’t work in “Playing tiddelywinks with manhole covers” and “Rosie the Riveter” in there.
Its common knowledge that the Hit Squad in their prime were unfuckwithable, but what they don’t get credit for is their gimmicks. Much like old Rap-A-Lot acts, the Hit Squad dudes had these silly subtle gimmicks, like EPMD was from the Boondocks, and Redman was from The Bricks and Das was from The Sewer. I even think forgotten white rap group, THe Knuckleheadz were from some catchy locale. Actually yeah, they were from the ‘Burbs I believe.
My point it, that whole sewer thing really came across in the beats Erick Sermon hooked up for Das Efx. Their shit really sounded raw and dirty like a nasty sewer. Of course, I sometimes feel like I’m the only person who bought their entire album because I’ll sing “Looseys” pretty often and the only person who knows that song is my friend Jay. Everyone else looks at me like an asshole.
I guess it was kind of easy to write Das EFX off after a real gimmicky first single, but that entire record is classic to me. After that, they kind of went to shit though, but their really isn’t any early 90’s Erick Sermon stuff that’s garbage. Probably because he got to all of the good samples before other producers could, but that’s how it was back then.

Raven Mack: Das EFX were discovered by EPMD one block away from the freshman dorm I lived in once I went to college. In fact, Das EFX had got signed but not yet released an album, and would often be seen hanging around trying to get pussy in front of the dorm. The place they got discovered was a thugged out (like more thug than the worst thug you can think of) joint called Ivory's. It was pretty much common knowledge that you stood a good chance getting shot in there. Not punched or stabbed, but shot. It was also pretty much common knowledge if you were white, do not go there. I was talked by two white girls into trying to go there one time to see the Pharcyde when their Bizarre Ride album was out. This seemed a silly idea, because I kind of assumed the Pharcyde were gonna get beat up at Ivory's, as opposed to a different type of clientele showing up for the event. Sure enough, me and the two white girls, both of whom had an affection for black penis, yet also somehow an affection for me, while walking there, got about a block away before three dudes using the pay phone by the Hardee's pretty much laid out how I'd best turn around or I was gonna get fucked up. I'm sure the white chicks could've forged ahead and had a good time and used rhythmic methods to try and not create babies and the ensuing drama that comes with that, but they turned back with me. And we went back to the one chick's house and sat on the porch and drank double deuces of Mickey's and every time a pimped out car rode down that side street, we'd say, "They're going to Ivory's." It was good fun.
One of the grandest murders to happen outside of Ivory's was, once the closing of the club led to snarled traffic on Broad Street like it did every Friday and Saturday night, one evening a dude who was driving an all-pink BMW - no shit - jumped out and shot up a car in the next lane with an AK-47, killing all three dudes inside the car. Of course, with traffic snarled, the pink BMW was useless, so dude just left it behind and ran off into the night, and as far as I remember, never got caught. It was probably another year or so before local affluent influences like the college I had attended back then got the city to use bullshit liquor violations to seize the property, like they could basically do to any club ever, but choose to pick their spots, kind of like NFL referees calling holding penalties. So Ivory's closed.
But that's where Das EFX was discovered. And I could never tell those two dudes apart, both with the dreads and "bum stiggiddy bum" nonsense... I figured they were twins, to be honest. It was such a gimmicky flow they had, yet crazily enjoyable, but only for a few songs. And this is their penultimate song, even though most of them sounded similar. This has the crazy style of them dudes, but crossbred with the mainstream appeal of remembering it being on the radio. In fact, I got my wife one of them new-fangled Ipod Lacostes for Christmas, and she's been bugging me to do internet voodoo and get this song for that machine of hers. It epitomizes a time of her life, and if a stupid song where people unnecessarily add extra syllables to every word can epitomize anything at all to anyone, it is the American Dream. Word is bond, motherfuckers, the American Dream. Das EFX Dude A and Das EFX Dude B might have shorn their locks by now and gone into a regular world job of selling insurance or refinancing mortgages or whatever, but for a while there, both them guys got to travel to places and even if they hit a town they'd never been to before, this song preceded their arrival and strange women would cause ejaculations from them dudes' bozacks. That's pretty much the essence of rock-n-roll, which isn't really any different than hip hop when you break it down beyond generational barriers. One man's groupie is another man's full steezie.

Download: Das EFX - They Want EFX

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