2.01.2008

Group Mentality: an introduction to some new stupid shit on dumpin

Group Mentality is a feature from my defunct zine where I would get 25 individuals to give me their top 25 list regarding a set subject, in order from #1 through #25. Then, I calculated up bullshit giving higher point values to higher listings and added the shit up and once it was all done we had a cumulative Group Mentality Top 25 of whatever the subject was. Usually these lists were full of crap, because, much like when it comes to major elections, popular consensus is usually stupid. Still, it was always interesting to see what ended up being the final list.
Talking it over with Mike, we decided to dust off this tired gimmick and revamp it for the dumpin.net blog of absurdities. However, I realize in the ten years since I did this with my zine, society at-large has become far more attention deficient, so I won't ask anyone to do a top 25 list of any subject, because most people couldn't. What I am going to ask instead is you do a top 10 list, in order, on the set subject, with five other honorable mentions. Only ten, in order from best to tenth best, with only five honorable mentions. I have point values attached to those positions, including the honorables, and that is what's going to shape the final list. So don't fuck around. And make your shit obvious and one thing. Like if the subject were "Best Rapper Alive" for example, saying "Wu-Tang" as your number one would be a fucking retarded and idiotic thing (which I'm sure someone will do now that I said it, regardless of the subject) because Wu-Tang is not a rapper, but a group of rappers and other people and corporate brands and you get the drift. The first 25 people to send in a list (ravenmack at gmail.com) are the 25 who make the list. You don't have to give reasons or long-winded rambles about why you chose what, although if you want to, we may use it in the final listings, but probably not. Most likely me and Mike will just talk about what dumbasses everybody is for liking what they like and not what we like.
Basically, you don't have to bust out pie charts and analyze seven thousand things to make your list in some sort of scientific fashion, although I'd appreciate it if you gave it some thought and didn't just freestyle the first 15 things that came to mind. But it should be how you'd probably feel again in a week, so allow yourself time to remember shit you forgot. In other words, take some time, think about it in the back of your mind, let it marinate, don't overthink over-analyze or become too much of a fucking fruit over it, then make your list and send it to me.

The first theme I decided to go with was All-Time Ass-kicking Movie Characters. I had initially thought about going with just awesome ass-kicking movies, but I know human nature when it comes to pop culture, and how retarded people are, and I could already see shit like The Fast & the Furious or The Matrix being at the top. Ugh. (Haha, I'm such a fag, I typed "Ugh." I should've said "Meh.") So we'll go with Movie Characters instead.
A few words of explanations - we're looking at all-time movie characters who kicked ass, not TV shows, but movies. Also, I would encourage you to rank higher characters who had more than one movie (in other words the character was ass-kicking enough to warrant sequels and shit), although I fully understand how sometimes one guy is so fucking bad ass when you see him tear shit up as a kid that you forever hold him in high esteem. (I say that, fully expecting Mike to be all up on some Over the Top love.) And really, with blaxploitation flicks, redneck superheroes from the '70s/'80s, kung fu movies, and post-hippie acid biker casualties reduxes galore, there's a ton of great dudes to pick from even before you get to the end of the '80s when computer faggotry enhanced an ass-kicking to even more cyberblinged degrees. But take some time, figure your shit out, and email a list. (You can just post it on the Secret Clubhouse message board if you want instead, where everyone can see it and mock you for being so stupid, or love you for being exactly like what they were thinking.)
But most of all, let this be an excuse for you to go revisit the classics of cinema, when dudes didn't fuck around, because for the most part, in movies today, there's a lot of bullshit fucking around going on and not enough good old-fashioned kicking of a deserving ass.

The second subject matter will be Greatest Rapper Alive, mostly because me and Mike were again talking in the Secret Clubhouse, and we find it funny how because Lil Wayne has said he's the greatest rapper alive so often, people actually believe it. So again, do a list of your #1 through #10, in order, with five honorable mentions (sent to ravenmack at gmail dot com), and we'll calculate up that group mentality too. Only requirement is it be an MC, and they be alive. If you want to honor founders and greats from the past who are still alive but not relevant, fine. If you want to just include dudes who are killing it now, that's fine too. Use whatever criteria makes you feel an expert whiteboy, work up your list, and send it my way.
I'll do Group Mentality updates around the 1st and 15th of the month (like welfare checks), letting you know how many spots are still open (limited to 25 contributions for each subject), and next time I'll throw up two more categories so we can have four running at a time, since I figure no one will ever do this anyways. Although, just from discussion on the stupid message board, we've got like 17 of the 25 for the ass-kicking movie dudes lists already. But don't let that deter you. I look forward to your participation. Once we get 25 lists on a subject, I'll figure up the final Group list, and then me and Mike will make fun of what dumbasses everybody is. This is a great exercise in true democracy and why we always end up with shitty leaders.