Hip Hop Ad Libs Part 3: WHAT?! OKAY!

Predictably I left a couple of entries off of my producer section, which are really two of the most amusing, so I don't understand why I forgot about them. Probably because I was posting the last post at work and was trying to get done typing it before my boss came into my office and didn't see any naked girls on my computer screen. Interesting how that's what my boss EXPECTS to see as opposed to any of YOUR bosses.


Kanye West: Now, Kanye doesn't have any ad libs per se, but the most hilarious thing that he mentions in EVERY SINGLE FUCKING SONG is that...in case you didn't know...Kan is the Louis Vuitton DON, man! What, you didn't know? 'Cause you know, he's the Don of Louis Vuitton, and he also wears a lot of VER-SAY-SEE. Insert eyeroll here. I long for the days when Kanye didn't have money. Personally living in LA and working in porn has made me REAL tired out on Louis Vuitton. All these bitches all over the place have a Louis bag. And most of them are knockoffs. Its so bad that I can tell when they're knockoffs and I don't even OWN a Louis bag. I will never own one, either. For one, they're so god damned ugly, for two...why be part of the bandwagon? I'm no fucking sheep. Still, you gotta love that manpurse he's got on in the above picture. Or not.


P. Diddy: Diddy doesn't exactly have a lot of ad libs but I swear he's been saying two things for the past 10+ years. #1 - On every track on the fade out he starts with: "WE WON'T STOP...'CAUSE WE CAN'T STOP!" Or some variation of that. The most hilarious thing about this statement is...it makes NO fucking sense. Now admittedly, I am a bit retarded sometimes so IT DOESN'T HAVE TO MAKE SENSE...! But just take a moment and say that to yourself. "We won't stop...'cause we can't stop" What? Huh?? #2 - He's always like "Take that, take that". I crack up with this one...and I blame the porn industry. EVERY single time I hear someone say that it seems a little on the vulgar side to me. As if he's telling some chick to open her mouth or something. You know what I'm talkin' bout.

DJ Ad Libs:

WARNING - I left off a lot of obvious choices, and only talked about the ones I've heard a lot of or supported, or bought their mixtapes (or bootlegged them). Keep in mind that I used to be a big mixtape person and then just got too involved with my own person drama to have the time or energy to devote to DJ shit.


DJ Khaled: A relative newcomer to the scene, I barely heard him for the first time on "Holla at Me Baby" early last year. In this first song I thought he was cool, he didn't appear all over the place in the video either. But then in every single god damned track that he produced or mixed or whatever after that...it just went all downhill. First he came with saying his name. Which is fine. Then he started up with his now trademark "LISTENNN!" Except when he says it, it sounds like he's saying it like "LISTEN-NUH!" Obviously we're listening dumbass! Why do you gotta tell people to listen when we're already doing it? The hip hop contingent isn't THAT dumb. Then he tries to get all PC with the "I'm about UNITY man!" Yeah, yeah. And lastly, the name of his second album..."WE THE BEST!" I desperately am hoping that by WE he doesn't mean Terror Squad 'cause they are most certainly NOT the best. The best one of them all is Fat Joe and he ain't even that great.


DJ Clue: Clue has definitely been making me LOL all hardcore since The Professional. His remix of Ruff Ryders Anthem was some serious shit though. I liked it (as per usual) much better than the original. It was then that I first hear his now trademark echo-y ass shouts out: NEW SHIT!! CLUE! CLUEMINATI! DESERT STORM! DURO! Okay so, the first two things he always says are all right in my book, you gotta make sure everyone knows who did the the remix, and then shout out your people. But Clueminati? Its obvious he's using his name as a reference to the Illuminati, which makes me laugh. He's on the wrong record label for that according to the EWA, in any case. And what the fuck does Duro mean? Can someone please let me know?


Don Cannon: A very new DJ on the DJ circuit, his first produced and remixed songs that I heard him on were "Go Crazy" and the "Go Crazy Remix". He actually does a fairly interesting and original (original as far as I'm concerned, only because I haven't heard enough mixtapes to know I guess) thing to put his trademark on the songs he either mixes or produces. He's got a little sound bite that he plays in the background of each song that just says, "CANNON...CANNON!" I swear it comes from a video game or something. I've been trying to figure out where its from. Someone holla at me and let me know where that's from, will you? I can't listen to a Cannon produced song without losing my mind about this. Well that, and sometimes the sound byte is simultaneously unobtrusive and annoying at the same time.


DJ Whoo Kid: Better known as 50's mixtape bitch, Whoo Kid's a decent DJ and all, and I guess I gotta give him props because he has very solidly had 50's back since all the bullshit beef with the Game. What's funny to me is that it doesn't seem like he even made an attempt to be original with his shit, all he does it a more echo-y, louder, and more drawn out version of DJ Clue's ad libs with his name. *shakes head* Apparently not only is there no originality anymore with hip hop artists, there isn't with DJs either.